Self-Esteem by Prof. Sam Nassif, Ph.D., PCC

Many ask the question how to be confident in yourself ? The importance of self-confidence and self-esteem does not need to be demonstrated.

My aim is to help you improve your self-esteem with an innovative and unprecedented Method based on the findings of Emotional Intelligence. My Method is called RISE which is the acronym of Rapid Improvement Self-Esteem.

Why would you trust me to offer this new Method for improving self-esteem? Permit me to briefly present myself. I am professor of leadership for the past 35 years and former Provost and Dean of the Euro-American University of Monaco.

I have been a coach for 18 years and graduated from the International Coach Academy. I am also a member of the I.C.F. (International Coach Federation) and holds the credential of Professional Certified Coach (PCC). While coaching managers and executives, I have used extensively the Emotional Intelligence to help people develop their full potential and maximize their leadership abilities.

My long experience in coaching has permitted me to create the following psychometric instruments & tools: « Leadership Style Evaluation » ; « Motivation Inventory Level » ; « Engagement Inventory Level » ; « Trust Inventory Level » ; « Value Inventory & Cultural Alignment » ; « Training Needs Finder » ; « Empathy Inventory Level » ; and « Rapid Improvement Self-Esteem” (RISE method).

On a personal level, I actively participate in several social organizations. Referrals acknowledge that my three core values are honesty, integrity and respect.

It is a fact that negative emotions are observed with low self-esteem: anger, envy, jealousy, pessimism, regret, greed, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, uncertainty, and fear from failure. These emotions affect our thoughts, and actions, hence our entire life!

On the opposite side, high self-esteem has a positive impact on emotions and result in: joy, peace, optimism, serenity, kindness, benevolence, empathy, self- confidence, generosity, compassion, courage, and risk-taking.

Having low self-esteem is a terrible thing because it can affect every part of our life.

Some people believe that they are masters of their own destiny. Other people see themselves as pawns of fate, believing that what happens to them is due to luck or chance. The first type of individuals – those who believe that they control their destinies – have been labeled “internals”, whereas the latter – who see their lives as being controlled by outside forces – have been called “externals”. Research has consistently shown that “internals” are more satisfied with their lives and have better health, since they believe that health is under their own control through proper eating habits, exercising, and the like.

What is the relationship between the “Locus of Control”  and Self-Esteem? It seems that “internals” when encountering a problem do not blame but themselves. They take responsibility for their decisions and actions. The evidence indicates that accepting accountability for success or failure increases the person’s self-esteem. Therefore, “internals” will take more risks and consequently will create more occasions for success.

A great deal of research confirms that people with high self-esteem are satisfied with their life and work. In addition, when your self-esteem increases, it changes for the better your Locus of Control.

The relationship between self-esteem and emotions is of such import on life, that it cannot be ignored: having low self-esteem is a terrible thing because it can affect every part of our life.

In the Method which I created in 2016, I will share with you some of the latest scientifically tested ways for overcoming low self-esteem and feeling good in your life. I have written this book so you can learn about the techniques which have helped so many to overcome their skepticism and encounter self-esteem and happiness. You will learn that by getting into action you will be entering into a new mode that will make you feel good several times a day. You will also be able to develop your own personal ways and adopt the behavior that suits your personality and makes sense towards increased levels of self-esteem.

I was extremely surprised to learn about the research conducted on some 40 000 students in the United States of America asking them to rank their needs and that the results were that 80% of the students ranked Self-esteem as number one priority. I got very much interested and started collecting books and articles about self-esteem. Then I consulted major academic research conducted by renown professors. My next step was to do a synthesis of the entire knowledge, which was very substantial. I noted the techniques that were presented to improve the self-esteem. One issue was very clear: all various techniques had their pros and cons, but all of them were very demanding in time and discipline. Knowing that our society has new habits “we want everything immediately”, I saw the flaws of these techniques and started searching for a technique which would necessitate only a few minutes a day and which could lead into successful results in a couple of months.

It was not until I was invited to learn about the Emotional Intelligence that I realized the new possibilities that could lie ahead.

It is easy to understand the process that takes place when we receive any particular information. Firstly, we receive it under the form of emotions, then we automatically and unconsciously translate these emotions into feelings and reasoning. All this happens almost instantly. When the reasoning takes place, we come to making decisions and decisions are in turn translated into choices and then into attitude and behavior. Therefore, we can observe that something which started from an emotion ended into a behavior. When we have low self-esteem and we receive an information of a possibility of launching our own business, our attitude will be similar to : ”I am not able”, “I will not succeed”, “This is not for me”, “I don’t want to fail again”. The behavior will be that we won’t take the risk of daring. Let me say, that we are in a period where “the biggest risk is not to take risks”; consequently we are missing the opportunities to try and succeed. The emotions which are finally translated into behavior are negative and pessimistic. The more we enter into this form of negativity, the more we are likely to continue missing our chances and lowering our self-esteem and self-confidence. The outcome and result will be an unhappy life.

When learning about Emotional Intelligence, I discovered that it is possible for a behavior to affect the emotions. Imagine the salmon fish swimming against the current and going upwards. Consequently, we need to find a behavior which can create “good feelings” in any person and that could be applied to all ages and to the 80% of the people who would need it. What could be that behavior?

I started asking hundreds of my students to define this particular kind of behavior which could trigger in any person internal good feelings. Imagine that such a behavior exists, and imagine that it is easy to develop and to put into action, what could it be?

My research led me to discover that “helping others” is that behavior. This behavior englobes a great variety of aspects, but which all belong to the same element. For example: being kind to someone, giving a helpful hand, rendering a service, listening to someone, showing empathy, smiling, helping a colleague at work, doing good to yourself such as taking a daily walk of half an hour, the examples are limitless. I labelled these behaviors “good actions” (many call them good deeds, but I prefer the word “Action” because it shows the “deliberate and positive movement of getting into action”. When I asked my students: what happens when you do a “good action”, they always answered : “we feel good”. This is an awesome result. The complete Method is found in my Book which can be acquired for a cheap price with all the details of the Method which consists of three simple and easy levels. Yet, I can assure you that the Method is very powerful and has been tested on a substantial number of people with successful results.

With my Method you do not need therapy or antidepressant or medications. It is a natural process that talks to the heart and imprints the program into the brain. It is based on the most powerful technique known as repetition. The more you repeat doing a “good action”, the more you receive” good feelings”, the more your self-esteem will improve to higher levels. The entire outcome, allow me to say it once again, is happiness!

My Method seems quite simple and evident for people who generally are looking for complicated techniques. But then I reminded myself that many of the greatest discoveries and explorations were not complicated and were initially viewed with skepticism. The Method is unprecedented and works very well. You will be convinced when you will have been testing and trying it by yourself. I honestly guarantee that the results can be quite profound and long lasting.

Research on Emotional Intelligence shows that having it is a good thing. By developing our self-esteem we develop our emotional intelligence and reciprocally.

A good deal of the Emotional Intelligence is to learn about one self’s emotions.

Emotional Intelligence is “an array of emotional, personal, and social abilities and skills that influence one’s ability to succeed in coping with environmental demands and pressures”. In short, Emotional Intelligence takes into account the way emotions are used in everyday life to benefit individuals. It also encompasses the fact that emotions can also be detrimental if not managed well.

The first thing is to “become conscious of own feelings and understand feelings of others in order to have effective relationships”.

Imagine having the strategies and tools you need to manage yourself and your emotions when you are feeling upset, angry or irritated! Learning how to improve your emotional literacy and being able to handle situations to your best advantage is a key concept which will lead to increasing self-esteem.

Emotional Intelligence theory shows people with high E.I. are more likely to be happy and productive. They are more confident and have less stress in their lives. In fact, people with good emotional intelligence generally do better at work and home because they are able to manage their feelings and be self-aware. These people are able to feel empathy for others and read others’ emotions, thus preventing conflict.

The good thing that everyone, no matter their age, has the ability to improve their Self-Esteem through exercises and persistence.

In the Emotional Intelligence, the self-esteem component is often associated with feelings of inner strength and self-confidence. Having high self-esteem has an impact on other areas of emotional and social functioning. Those who are assured of themselves generally have more energy to realize their true potential (self- actualization), have more positive outlook and optimism, are more able to express themselves with confidence, and are more satisfied with their lives.

Among the many outcomes of high Self-Esteem and Self-Confidence are positive attitude and happiness. High self-esteem leads to happy dispositions and to less stress symptoms, which in turn help derive a great deal of pleasure in life and at work.

The important thing for the reader is his/her personal experience. I have already insisted on the issues of optimism and pessimism because they are the source of depression which is currently the number one public health problem.

Those who are optimists may probably be inclined to believe that their part of optimism is sufficient and that it is not necessary to increase it. It could be an error, because optimism, like other natural gifts, can fade away. Many persons are optimists because their personal favorable conditions, or due to agreeable family environment or because they have a prosperous business. If these external conditions were to vanish it is possible that the level of optimism will decline substantially. Being optimist when we have everything is not a very difficult thing. Conversely, I have observed that some people who do possess these facilities are not among the best optimists. The true optimist is the one who possess it in a voluntarily manner. Such optimism involves mental, physical and spiritual aptitudes which can resist to various shocks that will not be able to undermine it. The real optimism is a lasting one with the capability of adjusting to the circumstances. Wise people have often declared that “peace is within yourself”. Science, logic and reasoning do not always explain everything; therefore, I invite you to search for the cause rather than the effects. The effect is always visible, while the cause is invisible most of the time. We must agree that everything takes place deep within us, in the unconscious more than in the conscious part. It is for this reason that we must affirm that doing good is a good thing, even if consciously we don’t believe in it. There is no skepticism that can resist several weeks to these repeated powerful affirmations. Look at the outcomes of the people who keep repeating that “everything is going wrong”! On the contrary, we must affirm the good, the beautiful and the right. By doing “good actions” you will achieve these affirmations and accomplish much higher levels of self-esteem and self-confidence. When we encounter an event, we have to consider what this event is creating within ourselves. No profound action can take place if not resulting from the action of one individual over one other individual. Which emotions? Which feelings? Remember that we are heading for “feeling good”. I would label this as our “internal strategy”. When we keep this internal strategy in our mind, we are likely to implement it regularly. What happens inside the brain is unknown and beyond logic and reasoning, but the effects are visible, and we can be proud of moving to a much more pleasant and happier life. In two words, let us decide and stop accepting to endure.

The process is as follows: Good actions create feelings and affective states that influence our memory. Our beliefs become our thoughts, our thoughts become our words, our words become our actions, our actions become our habits, our habits become our values, and our values become our destiny.

Goodness opens the heart and through the heart we can reach kindness, calmness and openness. By doing a Good Action we receive powerful emotions and happiness. By giving, we reach deeper understanding and feel love. Doing good actions will bring us more than we can ever imagine and will build a high level of self-esteem.

I put at your disposal this new technique so that everyone gets a chance to improve his or her self-esteem, to feel the positivity and empowerment a high self-esteem leads to and to live a thriving life.

I want to help you transform your life with a simple method aiming at improving self-esteem and self-confidence. As you will learn in the RISE method worldwide academic research has demonstrated time after time that self-esteem has a major influence in our lives: a low self-esteem can sabotage our entire life. On the opposite, high self-esteem increases self-confidence and definitely leads to a happier and more successful life. I invite you to start by taking the free self-esteem test which will measure your self-esteem and will tell you where you stand and how much boosting self-esteem you need.

My Method is unique; and it is the only method which connects emotions and behavior. It is the result of 25 years of research and experiments and has proven to be effective on people of different ages and backgrounds.

The RISE Method consists of three steps. Step one and step two last about ten days each, and step three requires one month. I promise you that in less than three months’ time your self-esteem and self-confidence will have substantially increased.

To facilitate the use of the RISE® Method a “3 clicks” page has been especially developed. It permits to keep track of the “3 steps”: each time you accomplish any one of the “steps” you can record it immediately with a simple “click” and thus monitor your daily results and your progress as you go along.

I invite and encourage you to use the “3 clicks” as much as you can. RISE will indeed help boosting self-esteem and self-confidence.

I want you to succeed in improving your self-esteem and start enjoying a thriving life.

Start now by building your self-esteem and self-confidence; do not postpone a major decision to change your life to the happier. Visit www.riseselfesteem.com

Self-esteem Test : www.riseselfesteem.com/test

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